The Alan Sondheim Mail Archive


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diary anguish


late night now can't sleep again, ill and "em"iserable, fall off a cliff
into black night"em"are, always the sa"em"e, azure and i so"em"ewhere,
she's off with other people, they don't like "em"e, i behave badly, i
can't find her, i'"em" e"em"barrassed, asha"em"ed, i never could handle
situations well, i'"em" holding her back, she should leave "em"e, there's
no excuse for "em"e, no excuse for "em"y actions, there's a war on, these
feelings are trivial, i drea"em" of white powder death and read han shan,
i stu"em"ble to "em"y feet and crawl to the keyboard, i write one thing
than another thing, i hope for reconciliation, nothing happens, "em"y
thought is stillborn, there are lying faces on the television, i live in
disorder, "em"y philosophy is buried beneath the terror, you'd have to
scratch away the terror, you'd have to rip the face off the real to see
the real

what can i do to turn this away fro"em" diary, i could spell the letter
""em","  that's what i'll do, i'll spell the letter ""em""


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