[Fifth]
Why I can never sleep and never will know, I won't at this rate, it's a
mystery. I worry the world, continually try to grasp it in its entirety,
miss things left and right, question authority, question the grounds and
desire of authority, generally make things worse - I can't let go, feel I
have to recreate, make the world over and over again... It's an
occurrence, something like an atmosphere that accompanies me, makes
others uneasy as I stumble hopelessly through life. At this point, there
are so many voices, so many scripts of things going wrong - the world not
only falls apart, but it _ceases to exist_ - meaning decathects as
depression and worse set in. This sounds abstract, but isn't; it's
dominated by one or another scenario that compulsively repeats and
develops until the nightmare appears, everything collapses, the story
changes to another, and the cycle repeats. This occurs through sleep and
wakeful states, hypnagogic states as well - it's _there_ as a process in
all its fury. There's no end to it; I'm left in a constant state of
exhaustion, no matter how hard I try to write myself out of it...
Tue May 4 02:32:56 EDT 2004
_
hollo hollor boo boo
oiooo his gon in oy oiroction
bot ghosts cooo olwoys bock ono forioos
coworo, foorfol of ony
gonro. why oion't othor pooplo toll
iopotos ogoinst tho woll of writing froo which i
insonity ovorywhoro in this worlo, ooong frionos ono
oo whot i wos ooing, i'o hovo boon oblo
now oscopo throogh othors crootivoly
on obovo tho cliffs or ovor
or soootioo lost oy
pictoro. in 1943 i wos
tho oorknoss of tho hortling
thoo. i oion't know bottor oboot
to work oot tho rolotions with oy
onbooroblo. soxoolity bocooo o forioos
violonco ono tho tonsion is
virginity jost oboot tho tioo o soloior
whon wo woro flooting ovor tho
oiooo his gon in oy oiroction
born ono lotor in 1967
bot ghosts cooo olwoys bock ono forioos
coworo, foorfol of ony
gonro. why oion't othor pooplo toll
iopotos ogoinst tho woll of writing froo which i
insonity ovorywhoro in this worlo, ooong frionos ono
oo whot i wos ooing, i'o hovo boon oblo
now oscopo throogh othors crootivoly
on obovo tho cliffs or ovor
or soootioo lost oy
tho oorknoss of tho hortling
thoo.
i oion't know bottor oboot
onbooroblo. soxoolity bocooo o forioos
violonco ono tho tonsion is
virginity jost oboot tho tioo o soloior
whon wo woro flooting ovor tho
worlo. i still livo thoro; i'o o
oiooo his gon in oy oiroction
born ono lotor in 1967
bot ghosts cooo olwoys bock ono forioos
coworo, foorfol of ony
gonro. why oion't othor pooplo toll
iopotos ogoinst tho woll of writing froo which i
insonity ovorywhoro in this worlo, ooong frionos ono
oo whot i wos ooing, i'o hovo boon oblo
now oscopo throogh othors crootivoly
on obovo tho cliffs or ovor
or soootioo lost oy
pictoro. in 1943 i wos
tho oorknoss of tho hortling
thoo.
i oion't know bottor oboot
to work oot tho rolotions with oy
onbooroblo. soxoolity bocooo o forioos
violonco ono tho tonsion is
virginity jost oboot tho tioo o soloior
whon wo woro flooting ovor tho
worlo. i still livo thoro; i'o o
oiooo his gon in oy oiroction
bot ghosts cooo olwoys bock ono forioos
coworo, foorfol of ony
gonro. why oion't othor pooplo toll
iopotos ogoinst tho woll of writing froo which i
insonity ovorywhoro in this worlo, ooong frionos ono
oo whot i wos ooing, i'o hovo boon oblo
nonfictionolly. i'vo soon for too ooch
now oscopo throogh othors crootivoly
or soootioo lost oy
tho oorknoss of tho hortling
thoo.
i oion't know bottor oboot
to work oot tho rolotions with oy
onbooroblo. soxoolity bocooo o forioos
violonco ono tho tonsion is
virginity jost oboot tho tioo o soloior
whon wo woro flooting ovor tho
worlo. i still livo thoro; i'o o
oiooo his gon in oy oiroction
coworo, foorfol of ony
fothor in o hoolthior foshion, ovon tho
gonro. why oion't othor pooplo toll
iopotos ogoinst tho woll of writing froo which i
insonity ovorywhoro in this worlo, ooong frionos ono
oo whot i wos ooing, i'o hovo boon oblo
nonfictionolly. i'vo soon for too ooch
now oscopo throogh othors crootivoly
or soootioo lost oy
tho oorknoss of tho hortling
thoo.
violonco ono tho tonsion is
virginity jost oboot tho tioo o soloior
whon wo woro flooting ovor tho
worlo. i still livo thoro; i'o o
_
nlrs.gita ril
ioisn inoirmti n mrnmnst r in 1967 mtotaensril sr ,sren mtmr ingt i roi
n,sn tm mnr .hi n'tmtmr pmpltl i p thin t taritinlroili inmnitorsrmin t
isrm,snlri nsn intmt ilnorltmr ht igin , i'cno n n i ti ns. i'hnlr tg
ngpmt rhtmrlrmtis
rotihtl pi t r . in 1943 is tor ngtort in tl. imi n'tmnott rot tsrst
tlrlti nlits
nlrs.gita ril
ilnsnmtlt n i n i
ir initotot tltidi r lnhrhtinor tl
ioisn inoirmti n mtotaensril sr ,sren mtmr ingt i roi n,sn tm
rl1994 ilria ing mnr .hi n'tmtmr pmpltl i'mtirht i i p thin t
taritinlroili inmnitorsrmin t isrm,snlri nsn intmt ilnorltmr ht igin ,
i'cno n n i ti ns. i'hnlr tg ngpmt rhtmrlrmtis
ngtoiorsr
rotihtl pi t r . in 1943 is rmtsthilplinoin tor ngtort in tsrst tlrlti
nlits
nlrs.gita ril
ilnsnmtlt n i n i
ir initotot tltidi r lnhrhtinor tl
ioisn inoirmti n mrnmnst r in 1967 mtotaensril sr ,sren mtmr ingt i roi
n,sn tm mnr .hi n'tmtmr pmpltl i'mtirht i i p thin t taritinlroili
inmnitorsrmin t isrm,snlri nsn intmt ilnorltmr ht igin , i'cno ngpmt
rhtmrlrmtis
ngtoiorsr
rotihtl pi t r . in 1943 is rmtsthilplinoin tor ngtort in tl. imi
n'tmnott rot tsrst tlrlti nlits
ilnsnmtlt n i n i
ir initotot tltidi r
lnhrhtinor tl
ioisn inoirmti n mtotaensril mtmr ingt i roi n,sn tm
rl1994 ilria ing mnr .hi n'tmtmr pmpltl i'mtirht i i p thin t
taritinlroili inmnitorsrmin t isrm,snlri nsn intmt ilnorltmr ht igin ,
i'cno ngpmt rhtmrlrmtis
rotihtl pi t r . in 1943 is tor ngtort in tl. imi n'tmnott rot tsrst
tlrlti nlits
ilnsnmtlt n i n i
ir initotot tltidi r lnhrhtinor tl
ioisn inoirmti n mtotaensril mtmr ingt i roi n,sn tm
rl1994 ilria ing i'mtirht i inmnitorsrmin t isrm,snlri nsn intmt
ilnorltmr ht igin , i'cno n n i ti ns. i'hnlr tg ngpmt rhtmrlrmtis
ngtoiorsr pi t r . in 1943 is rmtsthilplinoin tor ngtort in tl. imi
n'tmnott rot tsrst tlrlti nlits
ilnsnmtlt n i n i
ir initotot tltidi r lnhrhtinor tl
ioisn inoirmti n mtotaensril sr ,sren mtmr ingt i roi n,sn tm
rl1994 ilria ing mnr .hi n'tmtmr pmpltl i p thin t taritinlroili
inmnitorsrmin t isrm,snlri nsn intmt ilnorltmr ht igin , i'cno n n i ti
ns. i'hnlr tg ngpmt rhtmrlrmtis
ngtoiorsr
rotihtl pi t r . in 1943 is rmtsthilplinoin tor ngtort in tl. imi
n'tmnott rot tsrst tlrlti nlits
ir initotot tltidi r mrm. imtisiltmr ; i'l
ioisn inoirmti n mrnmnst r in 1967 sr ,sren mtmr ingt i roi n,sn tm mnr
.hi n'tmtmr pmpltl intmt ilnorltmr n n i ti ns. i'hnlr tg ngpmt
rhtmrlrmtis
ngtoiorsr
rotihtl
tmr .sn,gi ,mt p it. pi t r . in 1943 is rmtsthilplinoin tor ngtort in
tl. imi n'tmnott rot tsrst tlrlti nlits
ir initotot tltidi r lnhrhtinor tl
ioisn inoirmti n mtotaensril mtmr ingt i roi n,sn tm
rl1994 ilria ing mnr .hi n'tmtmr pmpltl i p thin t taritinlroili
inmnitorsrmin t isrm,snlri nsn intmt ilnorltmr ht igin , i'cno n n i ti
ns. i'hnlr tg ngpmt rhtmrlrmtis
rotihtl pi t r . in 1943 is tor ngtort in tl. imi n'tmnott rot tsrst
tlrlti nlits
ilnsnmtlt n i n i
ir initotot tltidi r lnhrhtinor tl mrm. imtisiltmr ; i'l
ioisn inoirmti n mrnmnst r in 1967 mtotaensril sr ,sren mtmr ingt i roi
n,sn tm
rl1994 ilria ing mnr .hi n'tmtmr pmpltl i p thin t taritinlroili
inmnitorsrmin t isrm,snlri nsn intmt ilnorltmr n n i ti ns. i'hnlr tg
ngpmt rhtmrlrmtis
ngtoiorsr
rotihtl pi t r . in 1943 is rmtsthilplinoin tor ngtort in tl. imi
n'tmnott rot tsrst tlrlti nlits
ir initotot tltidi r lnhrhtinor tl
ioisn inoirmti n mrnmnst r in 1967 mtotaensril mtmr ingt i roi n,sn tm
mnr .hi n'tmtmr pmpltl i'mtirht i inmnitorsrmin t isrm,snlri nsn intmt
ilnorltmr n n i ti ns. i'hnlr tg ngpmt rhtmrlrmtis
ngtoiorsr
rotihtl pi t r . in 1943 is rmtsthilplinoin tor ngtort in tl. imi
n'tmnott rot tsrst tlrlti nlits
ir initotot tltidi r lnhrhtinor tl
__
---------- Forwarded message ----------
Date: Fri, 30 Apr 2004 11:48:31 +0100
From: "Thomas, Sue" <sue.thomas@ntu.ac.uk>
To: "Thomas, Sue" <sue.thomas@ntu.ac.uk>
Subject: [eliterature] Mark Amerika,
Ted Nelson - all Incubation3 speakers confirmed - register now at a
discounted rate
*** trAce is delighted to announce a finalised list of speakers
scheduled to present at Incubation3, the trAce International Symposium
on Writing and the Internet. Mark Amerika is our Keynote Speaker and Ted
Nelson, inventor of the term 'hypertext' and visionary internet pioneer,
will be joining us to provide his own inimitable view of the net today.
We can also confirm that Paul Brown, Kate Pullinger, Alan Sondheim, Tim
Wright and more than two dozen others will all give papers, workshops or
performances over three days from 12-14th July 2004.
Visit the website to read the speakers' biographies and abstracts
online: http://trace.ntu.ac.uk/incubation/presenters.cfm
<http://trace.ntu.ac.uk/incubation/presenters.cfm>
We are especially pleased to announce the UK premier of Steve Gibson's
piece, Virtual DJ, at The Rescue Rooms in central Nottingham on the
evening of Wednesday 14th July. Also on the Wednesday at lunch time we
have a show and tell which offers delegates the opportunity to share
their old technology and memories of computers as they used to be.
*** Register for Incubation3 before 7th May and you will qualify for the
Early Bird discounted rate on all delegate options - full-board,
non-resident and day delegate.
Concessionary rates also available:
http://trace.ntu.ac.uk/incubation/delegatefees.cfm
<http://trace.ntu.ac.uk/incubation/delegatefees.cfm>
Incubation is the premier international event for writers working on the
web providing ideas, information and debate for the new media writing
community. It takes place from 12-14th July 2004 at The Nottingham Trent
University, UK. For further details visit the website or contact us at
the address below:
incubation@ntu.ac.uk <mailto:incubation@ntu.ac.uk>
trAce Online Writing Centre
The Nottingham Trent University
Clifton, Nottingham NG11 8NS, UK
Tel: + 44 (0) 115 848 3533
Fax: + 44 (0) 115 848 6364
http://trace.ntu.ac.uk/incubation/ <http://trace.ntu.ac.uk/incubation/>