The Alan Sondheim Mail Archive

August 29, 2010

Katydid Slowed

Digitally slowed katydid songs - according to Darryl Gwynne, Katydids and
Bush-Crickets Reproductive Behavior and the Evolution of the Tettigon-
iidae, katydid songs can range (in certain species) to 135kHz, and it
seems from the book that the true common katydids recorded at Mt Tremper
probably sing up to 50kHz or so. In any case, here are the files slowed
from the two forward mics of the four-track .wav, new music all its own.
(25% original pitch.)

frustration with shield-backed katydids
definitely a shield-backed katydid, but isn't in any of the online id
folk songs and katydids
followed by the northern song of the common true katydid - we did a number

Thinking About Retiring

I'm considering retirement; I'm asking for advice (back-channel); I'm at a
loss; I never thought I'd reach this point; it's a point of solitude; no
offline community, students, teaching; useless beyond occasional online
talks. I write too much, play (music) too much, think too much; it's too
much for me; too much for anyone; it's me. My friends don't return calls;
why should they; school's starting; all those residencies; commitments; I
sit in this loft (assume it's "this loft"); face the computer screen; the
viola; the keyboard; the video editing software; the guitar; the oud; I
decide what to do; I owe nothing to anyone. People visit on occasion; use
one or another of my pieces (video or music), disappear. I haven't seen
Myk (lap steel) for months; he's gone. I put work up at ESP-Disk; assume
someone listens; it's gone. Grants are gone; jobs are gone; I tire from
calling friends who don't have the time to return calls; I sit here; I
think this is a bother; admire my father who watches tv day in day out;
takes rides in the country; babbles; never did a creative thing in his
life; gave me chances I wouldn't otherwise have had; psychologically
abused me; has been retired over forty years; reads sometimes. I need to
know what to do; I'm getting suicidal; I live in vacuum; compose in
vacuum; think philosophy or dance or art in vacuum; push my own work like
an arrogant fool; wait for no returns; wait for the money to run out; the
building to collapse around me.

I don't want to go back to school as a student; tour aimlessly around the
country; volunteer for non-profits; my mind's still active. Invitations to
schools; for performances; for equipment use; have stopped. I'm sick of
the screen; this forced retirement; my sins have caught up with me; my
numerous crimes have taken their toll; you know where to find me; you just
don't know why.

Retire the cull:

wonder so many of us retire to the relative safety of cyberspace; here,
each segment! will retire all the others... the segments...
respects, seemed to him to be faultless. He had to retire to an uneasy
each segment! will retire all the others... the segments...
I would be a niter. I would retire from the machine. Perhaps I have a
better retire for this - how many were killed today - I can't remember a
They retire in aversion or fear.
each segment! will retire all the others... the segments...
terrific gunfire meets advancing foe; defenders retire coolly
each segment! will retire all the others... the segments...
female was just retiring to an inner room, when she suddenly came back
this terminated the dialogue, Julia retiring to her own room, carrying me
if retirement is a bridge that must be crossed when we get there
leisure and retirement by systematically shirking any labor

Suicide, the cull, far too many over 16 years:

 		    embryo suicide  suicide embryo
 		like now i think of suicide and hills
              O suicide O gnawed-blade hole O tourniquet punished by foaM
         Do listen to all smallthing suicide and leaping, say Alan
         Fear of deep death and do suicide.
         I would die. I want to die. I am so fantasy. I am so suicide.
       and suicide, say Alan and Nikuko
     [someone threatens suicide: does s/he really?]
    craw - a couple of other poets and myself have suicide poems in them.
    seppuku, suicide; shite, hero or shes elsewhere,
    suicide and leaping, say Alan and
   (cond (suicide-flag (dor-type ($ deathlst)))
  or suicide long gone wrong.
"or rather suicided along with opera."
'death)731: discipline lesbian murder infidelity hardcore suicide
(dor-put-meaning suicide 'death)
(dor-put-meaning suicides 'death)
-- turns suicide neither into a question nor an answer, but defuge and
. subway tunnel collapses as plastique and suicide bombers do their work
1973 I think this was the year Gail Klaymink (sp?) committed suicide; as I
2006 Barry Sugarman committed suicide; he was the hand drummer in our
I am incapable of keeping lines open and running, the wires suicide,
Alan, hoping I haven't let you down. Too many people here talking suicide.
Cybermind list. May 8, he committed suicide. He was a brilliant trans-
Designed to withstand suicide, it totters, but does it?
Do you ever think the whole world roars, that one can hear engines suicide
Electricity itself, and an odd suicide (humans/dynamo) constitute the
GIVE ME A SIGN; it is another night of suicide on this wider earth; I
Hello, yes, peace be with you, hello! I commit suicide! Humans
Hoffman a suicide, the rest of them either dead or in remission! This is
I am incapable of keeping lines open and running, the wires suicide,
I'll bet that you don't *really* want to commit suicide, do you?  If so,
If _the continuity girl_ commits suicide, does she break continuity? For
If this were a suicide note, I would leave you my all. You would hear my
Koresh or the BD said there would be no suicide.  Obviously
May suicide. He
Mizu, water; Nikuko, meat-girl; seppuku, suicide; shite, hero or hero-
Mizu, water; Nikuko-oozing, meat-girl; seppuku, suicide; shite, hero or
NEVER ENOUGH.  SUICIDE SQUAD patriot suicide squad.
Net sex, Net flame, Net ennui, Net suicide.
Now towards evening, Machine sleeps suicide quietly. What morning will
Russian might have said? Clearly to obstruct suicide is evil. If a child
Schneider says no one is coming out, no suicide, <k>denied Koresh
THEORY_NOISE that just went on and on, suicide background and foreground
That suicide,
The I-wound opens up, splits the body; what gushes forth, like suicide,
The There in evil will will coupled destroy suicide
The decision against suicide brings proof to the mountain.
They refuse the suicide, and even the sky fills with acronyms, inconceiv-
This is not a suicide announcement.
This isn't a preface to a twenty volume suicide note,
Treatment is almost always unnecessary, unless the theme is suicide or
Trying, energy and suicide
Two high school girls from Kasuya, Fukuoka committed suicide yesterday
We are patriot suicide squad.
You know, the whole world is electrified, suicide along on whatever funda-
You're always killing yourself, it's a kind of suicide, they're laughing
ability to write, i'll be a suicide, no longer existent. well now as you
again; death stalks me all my life. I live with the potential of suicide;
age close of unclear. with to unclear. time, to suicide, time, eighth
ahlfwillingly. we used to discuss a lot about suicide. when he sensed
all any more than if i'm building /dev/nul it doesn't mean suicide or
already a century old, energy and suicides
already century old, energy and suicides
an light area kiss fiber my chaos was in to suicide
an oddly retroactive form of suicide.
and death, about suicide/murder, _Lustmord,_ Jenny Holzer: What's going
and illness, perhaps suicide bombing, slow attrition by forgetting,
and j g suicide down by the river, gratitude towards authors, after doing
and over again, for suicide as the least harmful
and suicide were all entangled in the television image constricted rattle
and want it like this, suicide when i can't work any longer, when i become
anti-faustic dog nebula dog anti-faustic bar embryo bar embryo bar suicide
be of me, would not be anywhere. If this were a suicide note, you would
behind, still on, suicide away...
blood, disinvests the world with its poverties and suicides. At the edge
boasting, will lists, the i suicide restaurant there's out, i in know,
bottom all around the shore, where it is visited by suicidebirds in
burning the books. the books are suicides.
carried out. Later, after his suicide, she asked whether he said anything
chaos drives officer to suicide
chaos was in to suicide road cracking ## bubble ## the
circuitry suicide, no one's around
commit suicide." "Great Kant, As a believer calls to his God, I call
committed suicide on the JUNGLE GYM at his school. I never had a CRUSH on
committed suicide. One of them died by hanging from a playground jungle
coupled There with is suicide
covered and ugly, i am not a lovely suicidebird, lover, her nightmare
created us from the soil and water of the earth the suicide bomber is
danger, suicide was the first option that occurred to him. i dont blame
decompositions bacteria vegetation and suicidebirds and sparrows and
dev deviously, just as she lived, a case of possible murder, suicide,
disappear. well. on. physical. collapses. forever. lost. suicide. think.
discipline 731: pack dumb, stab discipline suicide things pack leave
discipline torture stab our things suicide artist discipline leave but
disease, inundation, mafia and gang rule, suicide bombers, new forms of
diseases and wars take over from depression and suicide.
domestic violence and suicide). philosophy, medicine, healing, peace, war
dor-$ deathlst suicide kill killing yourself t (If you are really
drugs, suicides,
ened suicide and then gave a number cut off half-way through i was there
face which moved smoothly as he stepped forward against the suicide that
flames, suicide, Lauren Hutton, distributed intelligence, Tonya Harding,
for this reason I'd all his attack on postmodernism a kind of suicide; his
friends were threatening suicide
frightened f for s suicide. l lying a awake a at n night l like this i i f
give me suicide, let me relax a bit
go suicide,
graveyard ditty, the mutual consolations of suicide lovers
has disappeared. But comfort alleviates suicide, and one may stay in this
heart, double suicide, you are inside my heart, i will kill myself, i will
hearts, wa wa inside heart, wa wa double suicide, wa wa you are inside my
her, sustaining herself on suicide wings with clinched talons, as if
i considered suicide as a bypass
immobilized; she remains elsewhere, dead - a suicide-talk of efface-
in first life are limit cases: suicide, euthanasia, etc.
inconceivable partings and attempted suicides and the ravages of
insufferable suicides trapped america, guns, riots energy, flower's iron
internet suicide with new everyone internet.
is momentary through three and a half billion years, the guise of suicide.
is the saying of suicide, I told you so. There is the saying of fear, so
island said, how do you do write suicide in avant-garde xxxx
it makes for dreaming suicide, dreaming patchwork for the very last time.
itself, meanwhile I go back on the MOO and wRItINg sez hears it's suicide
just the suicide sound. People are running and screaming again.
just tried suicide what did i think the fuck i was doing running out the
late-night talkshow; the guest said it can lead to suicide. The cut on my
line, secretly conservative? That I thought suicide, lived in death's
lovely suicidebird, delicate and caring of i am the pure swan to myself,
lovely suicidebird, delicate and caring of others. i am the pure swan
making of suicide hieroglyph
maybe approach approach leave suicide 'death)731: our things but murders
maybe leave 731: (doctor-put-meaning stab 'death)731: murders suicide
mechanism of an anti-bourgeois bourgeois who commits suicide by destroying
memory. in the reversed world, suicide is the
mover is its alleviation. But I would also argue for a suicide for trivial
murder and suicide?" That's what he said.  President Clinton, on
murderer, priestess, suicide. I travel through the slit! The slit in your
murmurs heard last no suicide. and heard heard and syllables for
my family is the family of books, suicides among 'em, turning towards ash,
neuras thenic freudianwise disasters suicides rages wars angers limit walk
never punishments never heals nor suicides not here
of my life, and the suicide attempt was hidden and probably not that
of outcomes, but it must be mass suicide. with a
of suicide there are some.
one's tendency towards suicide, which must be continually monitored. Not
one? suicide suicide suicide one?
or rather suicided along with opera.
overthrown, but that they commit suicide.
perturbing, too much talk of suicide. And if Jennifer, then ghost-like we
phonemes. suicide. won't i knife phonemes. for fall i i for and begone
potential final - and only - remaining process is suicide. Everything else
prayer of repetition murder and suicide
projectors suicide poorly in the background, speakers roaring before us -
pulleys, invisibly molded in something suicide over the wires, never
satori-boyve does the suicide_emotion of a dog_fuck so the slave of the
seventy two  sets live furious diseases wars take suicide  up  this  end
she had just attempted suicide, and when I reached her in the hospital,
she thought of bees suicide all around, she thought about flowers.
shikibu does me kimono kraus and tears and violette leduc and j g suicide
should use extreme care before he classes them as suicides." suicides.
sides of the self! We are all close to suicide, all pleading, but never
site where a suicide tries to shoot" jennifer failing, her fear of the
so that i try to sleep here wires suicide all about me
somewhere in Asia; suicides are the Japanese order of the day. Or a
speaking suicide, "I'm going to take my dog and go into the desert and I'm
strokes; you can hear the suicide of the strings. The signified becomes
suicide bar the the
suicide bombers, storms and lightnings, the destructions of languages and
suicide for Nikuko
suicide hoax - Michael Current's response - the complaint to the sys-
suicide jennifer is jennifer my jennifer friend
suicide not science the solution.
suicide of the line as the object fills the frame - it is this space
suicide or that REWRITE was always a continuous suicide. No one would
suicide to death - just so - not tiredness, no, certainly not arousal, not
suicide unloved
suicide zz
suicide). philosophy, medicine, healing, peace, war and survival elders
suicide, death's
suicide, etc., which are problematized in SL...
suicide, for eighth we for when we year when tried year so, tried up so,
suicide, the story of initialed names carved into absent substance.
suicide-bird and soft wind, for the telling of it is the reading of it,
suicide. The book is simultaneously a warning and an account of what went
suicide. brilliant
suicide; this
suicide_emotion of a dog_fuck so the slav e of the altcrazy-satori-dog-
suicides trapped america, guns, riots energy, flower's iron petals, bodies
suicides, rages,
temper and my fears of just being alive? I tried suicide as a kid, mixing
the disasters through drugs, through suicides, through rages, through
the the suicide the future the future the bar jaguar jaguar jaguar bar
the to laugh f of ants interchanged=ant*suicide*the was it where city=of
the wall of China; a suicide-bird which an American pricess wore in her
the wires are suicide, as if carrying sensibility multiplexing beyond our
the yearning protocols singing) your saw-palmetto suicide my the yearning
thinking suicide, the production of a thing
this IS a suicide note!
thought. between madness and suicide, this pain looms. do i need atten-
to myself, covered with ugly young." i am not a lovely suicidebird,
track16 gallery la such blessing barry sugarman suicide he's johnson's
twenty volume suicide note, this IS a suicide note! That is, if I don't
unclear. to time, suicide, eighth for we when year tried so, up lived with
unclear. unclear. to to time, time, suicide, suicide, eighth eighth for
ured. It leads to suicide, dysfunction. I don't think cyberspace helps
vandalized by schoolmates soon after the suicide. There were still,
vegetation suicidebirds sparrows flies mites "i detest her because i
violence and death and suicide were all entangled in the television image
was swill. I perform emptiness. If I send out a suicide note = nothing. I
way. What happened was that someone posted a suicide hoax for April
wharfcry, the nurse's suicide, are equally embodied, that the promulgation
whispers darkness warmth inconceivable partings attempted suicides ravages
will be assumed that I documented my inexorable march towards suicide or
with suicide, with despair, but the screen of Buddha, emptying out. No
would a bee or a suicidebird, Heidegger, Dasein
yacking, yapping, suicide, singing, whatever bodies do, I guess cry,
year suicide;
you are walking down the street, when you are suicide in the shower, when

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