Message-ID: <alpine.NEB.2.00.1307210141220.949@panix3.panix.com>
From: Alan Sondheim <sondheim@panix.com>
To: Cyb <cybermind@listserv.wvu.edu>, Wryting-L <WRYTING-L@listserv.wvu.edu>
Subject: would shed something
Date: Sun, 21 Jul 2013 01:43:10 -0400 (EDT)
would shed something http://lounge.espdisk.com/archives/1175 (best) http://espdisk.com/alansondheim/woodshed3.mp3 woodshedding the erhu, learning to play double stops in mid-air, what the hell, the bow can bend that way, difficult to keep the parallel fifths but then the fingers take off independently working the strings, the bow's shuddering, it's all there, several notes at once, but who the hell cares, whatever it is, it's like masturbation, taking control of the erhu body as my own, but what comes afterwards a kind of anger and disgust at myself, no one else is present or cares that the harmonic sequences are going all over the place out of sync, there are also echoes of echoes, it's all in the bow, fierce switching between strings, and i think that all that's between me and death are thirty or so little pills, but that's not a good enough reason to do this or a good enough reason to listen to it for that matter, all these post-culture-revolution strings turned to metal and loudness, i don't want to hear metal, silk or gut or nylon would be fine, something bringing out different overtones than the usual ringing series, i'll carry this reverberation to my death, mixed with my tinnitus, maybe i'm deaf to whatever the hell is going on, you need a good bit of rosin all throughout the bow for this stuff, even on the wood, gives you free-range musics, whatever's going on i work my bones into it, that's out of the running with prosthetics, machines can do it better without feeling the pressure of the strings, calculating it maybe, but i'm working myself into a fury, the back of my mind filled with muddy scenarios of homelessness, instruments smashed into the mud, health ruined, the world at war, don't let me listen to your bloody scratching back and forth like your skin's tearing off, it's not music anyway, what the fuck, i don't know anything about music but i know what i like