The Alan Sondheim Mail Archive

my most carefulll beautiful music ever casio w/revrev

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http://www.alansondheim.org/carefulll.mp3
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(for esp-disk website, 2002)
*/2015/*

some things on the music */[...]/*

i or so

avoidance of noise ,then how to schedule fury or furious ,how to
subtend silence */how to breathe ,how to subtend breathing/*

i don't want this thinking: that this is exploring instrument,
instrumentality ,nor a field ,subtended by fingers or mouth ,no
more than body

but the joist of particle physics ,muons on a sense of virtual
particles on another

(a b) (a, b) (a / b) (a : b) (a | b) (a f(a, b) b)

it is all resonance ,surprising ,metallic overtones ,ringing: i
remember just several sounds slowed into what seemed right even
then

*/thinking among unthinking ,something about emptiness ,but
something about thrust and elimination ,the tube ,the platform/*

foreign names touched by cultural illiteracy ,materials ,soundings,
emptied virtuosities

stringed, it is stringing ,perfect tautness ,resistance of
parallel field ,tension of endpoint separation ,tension of
separation */tension of aspiration ,breath-length ,incomplete
phrasing/*

i do not want to duplicate this ,i do not want to duplicate an
other

*/i wanna be an other ,i dont wanna be an other other ,i wanna
be hir ,i wanna be hir breathe/*

something informing ,hypnagogic as if you might dream this ,an
other or dream an other this */i wanna breathe hir/*

but not tiring ,tirade ,more of a space of a sounding or what
might be 'some of a sound' */i dont wanna tirade ,now too much
violence everywhere, wanna something else/*

of mewling ,howling ,whimpering ,murmuring ,seething ,then this amazing
release

neither to be where you have been nor will have gone there ,here is
one alone ,playing music ,playing music together

tending the wood ,nylon ,skin ,metal ,plastic ,catgut ,horsehair
,wax, bamboo ,bone ,or tending the wires */tending the reed ,the
silk ,sub-tending the air within ,thinned line among these/*

the absence of metaphor ,wires ,no paralleling ,the difficulty
of absence ,no equivalence ,no identity ,just as everything else is,
or remains ,inert

sound of the obdurate ,sound of the inert

ii or so

learning to play these ,evenings or nights' mornings ,but with
all respect ,coaxing ,no world music ,no world but what ,are we
brought, to */,but what world has brought us/*

here's an idea ,so i'll do it ,hear what happens ,when new ,then
so it is brought */,then so it is given/*

always writing in silence ,always playing in silence ,playing
silence, listening silence ,enormous roiling ,slow extinction of
the planet, these last sounds ,instrument making ,them

she got up from the music ,he got down to the music,
he got up from the music ,she got down to the music

you'll be telling me specifically what you want to know,
i'll be telling you specifically what you want to know

allowing myself the courtesy of being-deaf,
allowing yourself my fingering you ,of being-sound & of mind & body

listing ,yayli tanbur ,ukulele ,cobza ,hasapi ,cura cumbus
,hegelung, rababa ,electric saz ,valveless chromatic harmonica
,parlor guitar, classical guitar ,alpine prime zither ,alpine
elegy zither ,like the emptying of names */listening to others
,fast-forward changing instrumentation/*

unknown on my fault ,something else of shameful ,refusing
abjection in the moment when nail and steel ,flesh and wood
,collide

unknown ,everywhere i look ,unknown

iii or so

i'm not giving you what you want ,that is ,an entry into this
sound, some of an anecdote ,or at the very least, an explanation
,as in, 'you owe me an explanation' */or you owe me nothing ,or
you begin ,just now ,to owe everything ,you owe nothing to me/*

i wouldn't know how to begin ,perhaps in eternal sorrow
,mourning, every minute of the life ,or the slightest peaks of
joy ,or stories about failure quantum-tunneled into music of
unutterable beauty ,or musics

or something about how these instruments came about ,what do i
know of their arrival ,or this i know ,their attraction for me
,sounding of the world through them ,fretless ,they are teaching
me how to listen ,place each finger in its rough exactitude
*/,watch the finger travel/*

or fretted in narrowed intervals ,what might be ,for others ,or
those places of others ,a difference in any world ,or numbers of
worlds ,worlds without number ,over and over again, desperately
listening ,listening ,as if something might come about, occur
,just by the sheer force of it

or the slow sweep of the bow as left hand fumbles for tone or tune,
begins its slower repetition ,*/[...]/*savoring

iv or so

it is more you want ,more you ever want ,this savagery ,this
lack of mine ,of yours ,one more word ,phrase ,sound or tune
,book or text, of book and of sound ,of tune and of text ,that
will do it ,completion, or suturing ,the fullness of the world
,fecundity, repleteness, lathering ,or foam of planck mass
,length ,time ,of vacuum and an energy ,of particle and fray
*/,too much physics ,unthinking ,what this has to do with it
,revrev and anticipatory architectures ,philosophy and
archeology of hope/*

this savagery a savagery ,silence a quiescence, calmness ,the
piercing ,of things ,of some things ,on the music ,on the music
borne