Message-ID: <alpine.NEB.2.21.1805251916080.10908@panix3.panix.com>
From: Alan Sondheim <sondheim@panix.com>
To: Cyb <cybermind@listserv.wvu.edu>, Wryting-L <WRYTING-L@listserv.wvu.edu>
Subject: my damned fingers / slave to repetition / bad habits /
Date: Fri, 25 May 2018 19:17:57 -0400 (EDT)
my damned fingers / slave to repetition / bad habits / my fingers have their own way, not independent but the usual trite dances, c, c#, d, d#, e, f, blah blah blah, my right hand doing this moronic dance on the lower echelons of the clarinet, my left hand bungling the upper echelons on just about any string instrument.* i hate the dreams of them, my damned fingers, useless thumb, sometimes it reaches over the neck or jumps one way or another (this left thumb of mine), i work all of this over and over again for no purpose at all, the talent was never there, i practice uselessly like having extra limbs that don't reach the ground. we almost never play out, we're never on call, i play for myself like that moronic solitaire i must have mentioned above or not at all, the letters keep shifting around like my fingers try but fail to do something like that. did i say our albums sell zero, we get no royalties, we give them away, sometimes you might give an album in return which is always neat.* but the fingers, it goes back to that. oh, and the breath as well, puff puff puff. the fingers, one two three, three two one. the breath, in, out, in out, like moving furniture cartons around a warehouse door, there are trucks around, loading and unloading, i'm getting out of breath just thinking about it. puff puff puff 123 321 123 321 or just the exchange 12 21 12 21 or 13 31 13 31 or 23 32 23 32 or puff ffup puff ffup puff ffup blah blah blah. "my fingers have their own way, not independent but the usual trite dances" with the usual stale music, pretty much dead, i'll give up, i'll do the dead thing, http://www.alansondheim.org/cc.mp3 clarinet http://www.alansondheim.org/bb.mp3 clarinet http://www.alansondheim.org/clari.jpg , i can stand in a room and pretend there's an audience, there's even fingers, there's even fingers moving, can't even get the grammar right, is there such a thing as grammar (beyond the usual trite dances???)** -- -- *logical conclusion, that our music is bad. ** 1234 1234 1243 1243 1234 puff puff puff bandcamp coming soon +++
